Who will you believe?

By Allison Pennington

I remember some days back… They were painful days. I found myself yelling a lot, and crying. I was not in a concentration camp, or being tortured and interrogated. I was not being beaten and by anyone. I was just living in a regular house, with regular food, a regular car, and in a regular city.

So what was all of the yelling and crying about? I had a regular family. Now this should not make someone yell and cry, but I saw so many problems and I worked so hard to stop the problems. I poured myself into these people and they didn’t respond the way that I thought that they should. Was I to blame? Quite simply, yes.

I was trying to control the situation, because I did not believe that God could control it, AND control it perfectly. I was afraid that I would lose something. Fear, our enemy, told me that God did not have things in control, or the ability to make the outcome good. I believed the enemy rather than God. Other people tried to tell me this truth, also. I did not believe them, either. God had to allow me to find out on my own.

But He said to them, “Why are you fearful, O you of little faith?” Then He arose and rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was a great calm. [Matthew 8:26]

After enough emotional pain and embarrassment, guilt, shame, and tears, I realized that I was not getting anywhere! You know the saying, “Been there, done that.” That is how I feel about trying to control, manipulate, or even worry about family now. How are my family members doing “without me?”

Awesome! My sons both serve the Lord and minister the Word of God, and my daughter has the Word hidden in her heart. My Mom and Dad both passed away covered by the blood of Christ. Even my husband is saved! The best news is that I live in joy and peace in the Lord’s arms. Free of bondage!

Did it happen immediately, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye? No, it didn’t. It took time for me to learn to trust God. It is a process. The Bible says, “I am speaking in familiar human terms because of your natural limitations. For as you yielded your bodily members [and faculties] as servants to impurity and ever increasing lawlessness, so now yield your bodily members [and faculties] once for all as servants to righteousness (right being and doing) [which leads] to SANCTIFICATION.” [Romans 6:19] We need to come to a place and make a decision to obey God. We then need to trust that He will provide what we ask for (and what we don’t ask for, but need.) I asked Him for faith. I had to ask Him to do for me what I could not do on my own. Did He provide? “Now to Him who is able to do EXCEEDINGLY ABUNDANTLY above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us [Ephesians 3:20]. Jesus says to us in His Word, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it ABUNDANTLY [John 10:10] Who are you believing?

Here I would like to add, write to me if you are going through a trying time and I would love to share your burden and our Lord’s hope with you.

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